IN THE DAWG HOUSE

Dear Dawg Whisperer;

My wife and I are completely on opposite ends of the political spectrum.  I’m a Republican, she’s a Democrat.  When the subject comes aroudn to politics, the conversation rolls into debate and then morphs somehow into a heated fight.  as you can imagine,  the election year wasn’t pretty in our house.  It makes me wonder how we’re going to handle teaching our baby son about politics when he gets older.  Any advice?

Wow, it still amazes me how couples on both sides of the political aisle even hook up.  It happens.  Those exicting, dreamy feelings when one is in love tends to cause a blind eye to political leanings or the fact that she’s a bible thumper and you’re an atheist.

When that honeymoon phase is over and conversation takes the place of getting jiggy with it, that’s when things get tricky.  There is inspiration.  Take James Carville and Mary Matalin for instance.  Fourteen years of marriage, two children and raking in an income of exploiting their political differences.  Debate is healthy.  It opens the mind to make you either question or confirm your beliefs.  When the debate starts taking an ugly turn into personal attacks and feelings being hurt, well, that’s when you’re sleeping on the couch.  The reality is, you’re going to disagree on many things, not just politics.  Day to day stuff like the toilet seat, what to have for dinner and the fact you don’t get enough sex.  To disagree is normal.  We can’t have Bob Siefert moderating the discussion, so there’s a few tips to keep in mind once you’ve both realized you don’t like the words coming out of the mouth that you love to kiss.

First step, ban the words “relax” and “calm down” from your vocabulary.  Any sentence that begins that way will definitely be a one way ticket to teh “booty free” zone.  If you like spending time getting the cold shoulder or being looked at like she wonders what she ever saw in you in the first place, then fire away.  Try and stay away from “That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard,” or anything along those lines.  Replace those words with what I call the magic phrase, “I understand.”  A woman always wants to feel like she’s been heard and her feelings are respected.  It’s okay to disagree, but use that phrase and then diplomatically give your opinion.  You can always agree to diagree and stay away from your trigger point topics, like politics.

When it comes to teaching your child about politics, think …less dictator and more journalist.  Unbiased.  Give your child information about party platforms and their histories.  If your child asks your opinion play like the FCC and give “equal time” to the other point of view. Your wife.  Then, cut the cord.  Trust your child to make up their own mind.

When junior grows up and decides he’s on Mom’s side, don’t contemplate where you went wrong.  Suck it up.  Look forward to healthy debates guaranteed to be held on ALL major holidays.

The Dawg Whisperer

If you’re in the dawg house or have a relationship question, send an email to dawghouse@ktar.com